I don't know how to explain the way I feel right now... Because it is one of those days, I got new feeling added to my feelings tribe.
Feeling of freedom.... Feeling "chill" finally. It is cool adult kind of feeling... Meaning - I am finally responsible for all of my shit....
I am still not completely free from my past chains. But life has been good to me, and I should never complain again...
With that said ....
I just rented me my ..... wait for it...... God Is God..... MY very first own place with out co renters help.
WHat I mean by it is... I was married for years... I divorced in china.. I never had a job in USA... and Now I have been back in here for few months.. ANd finding my way.. And it has been hardest process ever.. To the point I feel that I have to prove myself again everywhere as an individual.... And it is empowering...
Few of my "people" , or as they wished to call me have tried to rush my process... But never rush this process... What is meant to happen will happen... It is given... I am guilty of dismissing the signs as well.... But when one is mentally , spiritually, aware... Things start to happen you never thought will happen....
I am 38 and am just starting to live my life.... LIVE with purpose that is....
Some get it at early age... But for me... finding myself has been complicated journey......
I am not going to say much more about it now..... We all have lives that make sense at one point..... I know what is my purpose... I have not figured out yet how i can utilize it.... .
Patience dear...
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